Spenard: It's a state of mind
February 28, 2006
Happy Fat Tuesday. This year for Lent, I am giving up my New Year's resolutions.
What the hell happened to spring? Mother Nature is so cruel...getting my hopes up like that. It's not fair. It's just not fair.
But soon, Rancho Spenardo will be green again...
February 24, 2006
I don't care what the thermometer says. It's spring, I'm tellin' ya. Fifteen degrees be damned! The little green plants growing outside at work are still alive, so it's still spring.
We also had a visitor of the moose variety at work this afternoon.
In honor of the changing seasons, Skully has changed from his winter gear into his Mardi Gras garb.
See that fistful of beads in his left hand? He's waiting for you to show him your tits.
The big news is I'm going to be in a play! I haven't been in a play since the mid-1970s when my second grade class put on a Christmas production retelling the story of Jesus' birth. I was the off-stage narrator, standing in the back of the gymnasium with a microphone. I think I read from Luke. Won't see that in a public school these days!
My current character is a lot different from the one I played in second grade. For one thing, I get to swear a lot more in this role. And the closest I get to quoting the Bible is taking the Lord's name in vain. My character, Shannon, is the sarcastic, foul-mouthed, substance-abusing sister. (The first one to make a joke about method acting gets their ISP banned. You've been warned.)
February 17, 2006
It's officially spring! I know that's not what the calendar says. And I know that there's still lots of snow out there. But I'm telling you: IT'S SPRING!
It's not just because it's been warmer that usual (up to low 40s!) and not just because I stepped in a pile of thawed dog poop. No, it's more than that. I found a spider spinning web in my bathroom. And best of all, there were
little green plants growing outside!
Sure, it'll get cold again. And well probably get a little more snow. But daylight is coming back - we're gaining over 5 minutes a day - and winter is on the run. Light is triumphing over dark, and in a couple months, all will be right again.
I've been spending a good portion of the last couple of weeks cataloging my vast collection of miscellania from the last millennia - trying to figure out how much it may be worth.
Stay tuned for Jackie's Internet Yard Sale where I put the souvenirs of my life on display in hopes of trading them for your filthy lucre. Since so many of my belongings have intrinsic sentimental value - it's been hard to put a cash price on many items. But don't worry, I will.
Start thinking now about how much you'd be willing to pay for an 1881 Noah Webster spelling book.
Or a original vinyl copy of Guns 'N' Roses "Live ?!*@ Like A Suicide."
Or the only existing copy of my first book: The Death Period. It's a harrowing tale of life, love and war in Nazi Germany - written and illustrated by me, Jackie Carr, at the tender age of ten.
We're down to T minus 10 months and counting until Marley & I pack our few worldly belongings into the little Mitsubishi to drive across the continent. Well...my few wordly belongings. All Marley has is a food dish, a litter box and a feather tied to a string. But that's all she needs, man. That's all she needs!
Comments? Questions? Spare change?
Send it to Jackie at RanchoSpenardo.com
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